I thought long and hard about what to write for EquiTeam’s blog this week, some of the ideas, ‘Let it go’ and ‘Right horse… wrong time’ are half written and will make an appearance at a later date but didn’t feel quite right somehow as there is something bigger brewing!
I don’t like to talk about ‘me’ but I think this week might be an exception because it occurred to me that this is how many people feel on their horse.
With the launch of EquiTeam, my usual three other jobs, small people, horses, competing and the day-to-day life stuff; the last few months have been crazy. My life is always a level of total crazy, but to be blunt, this has been crazier than the Tasmanian Devil on drugs.
I’m not sure if I am coming or going, I’m not sleeping great, my head feels like it might pop and I have that constant ‘there are not enough hours in the day.
‘OMG, I’m drowning’ feeling and ‘what if people don’t like EquiTeam’.
After a coincidental conversation with Liz S’s husband, Hugh, it hit me that actually what I’m feeling is a huge amount of self-pressure and a touch of imposter syndrome.
I know that a lot of you can relate to the self-pressure part of this when you are in the saddle – so let’s explore some more.
What is self-pressure?
I was unable to find a clear definition as it seems there are a few explanations, but to me self-pressure is the ‘pressure you put on yourself to meet the expectations you have set, or you think others have set.’
This can result in you constantly being hard on yourself and the unhelpful feelings of self-doubt.
When it’s in check, self-pressure is a great tool because it can help to drive you to achieve your goals. When it gets out of hand it’s not very useful. This has been me over the last few weeks!
I know that with some of the people I teach that the self-pressure when riding often stems from:
- What will people think
- I ‘should’ be doing better
- They are doing better than I am
- I used to jump higher, why can’t I do that now
What can we do about it?
Cue Google search..!
Google gave me some really good suggestions and in summary this is what I found:
- Understand high achievement vs. perfectionism
- Be kind to yourself
- Celebrate the small wins on the way to the end goal
- Recognise and accept praise
- Balance being a hard worker and having a work/life balance’
- If the self-pressure isn’t helpful explore other ways to manage it
I’m not sure that all of these resonate with me – but there are some that are leaping out of the page!
I have realised, from my small amount of research, that my own feeling of self-pressure is partly due to a lack of self-confidence/belief, the feeling of wanting to do my best for others, and in my case largely to do with the fact I really care!
While I don’t feel these pressures on my horse it has been interesting to explore this topic and one thing that I’ll take from this is that I should allow myself to be proud of our smaller achievements – which is something I am ALWAYS telling everyone I teach (maybe I should take some of my own advice on this one).
To finish I’d like to leave you with this quote which I particularly liked from Mind:
“The brain is like an engine; if you run it too hot all day, every day without checking the oil and water, it breaks.”
Thanks for reading,
Liz x
If you would like to do your own research, or need support have a look at these resources.
Mind
Riders Minds
Or you can contact Jane Brindley from Horse Riding with Confidence Scotland.
